Digimon Adventure S01E04

After a lovely harmonica-disrupted nap, the kids walk through the forest in search of… anything, really. They come to the end of the forest and wander the desert for a while, because that’s a good idea. It turns out it really was a good idea, because they find a village full of Pyokomon! And they have food and water! The water, unfortunately, falls victim to sudden plumbing issues and is replaced with fire, which is marginally less helpful. A plumber, Meramon, arrives from Miharashi Mountain, but it turns out he’s the one who replaced the pipes with flamethrowers. Piyomon evolves into Birdramon and sets him (more) on fire to see how he likes it. He does not like it, sees the error of his ways, pops a black gear out of his back, repairs the plumbing, and returns home. Everyone celebrates with a feast of delicious seeds.

Narrator: “Taichi and the others decided to spend the night next to a lake, but Seadramon attacked at that time. Then Yamato’s Digimon, Gabumon, evolved into Garurumon.”
Matt: “I guess it’s my turn to fill you guys in. First we have a close call with these twin metal dinosaur-looking creatures, then when we were about to crash for the night, wouldn’t you know it? We’re camped out right on top of a big, wicked serpent thing that goes by the name of Seadramon. That’s when things got intense. I got snatched up, and Gabumon digivolved into a huge blue wolf called Garurumon. Lucky for me, Seadramon was no match. Whenever we’re in danger, our Digimons get bigger and help us. Now that’s cool!”

“Digimon” is not canonically pluralized with an ‘s’, but the dub does it anyway during the first arc. Afterward, the writers are pretty consistent about using the canon pluralization. It seems there was just a direction/writing slip-up at the start of the series.

---

[A black gear flew overhead]
Taichi: “What’s that sound?”
Yamato: “It looked like a gear.”
Sora: “Wasn’t it a flying saucer?”
Mimi: “It could have been a gear-shaped meteorite.”
Jou: “Whatever it was, something didn’t feel right about it…”
Sora: “WwwwHEEY!”
Taichi: “Whoa, did you hear that?”
Matt: “It seems to be some sort of aircraft.”
Sora: “It looked like a big, flying Gear!”
Izzy: “Admit it: my alien theory is becoming more plausible.”
Joe: “Yeah! They hit us with an anti-gravity ray to make us all crooked … or maybe that sign’s just crooked.”

Gear, get down from there! You’re messing up the signs again!

[Takeru slips]
Takeru: “Oww…”
Taichi: “Are you all right, Takeru?”
Takeru: “That hurt… but I’m okay. I can tolerate it.”
Sora: “It’s okay if you can’t. It’s okay to say it still hurts.”
Takeru: “Okay… Honestly, it hurts a little.”
T.K.: “Whoa! That was scary!”
Matt: “Watch it!”
Tai: “That could have been a SNAKE. Or WORSE!”
T.K.: “Oh, boy! I’m sorry! … Hey, Biyomon. Are there really snakes here?”
Biyomon: “No, just giant flying killer bugs and other unpleasant Digimon.”

Tai proceeds to put the fear of snakes into a small child after he merely slipped on an unstable root. T.K. apologizes for not-so-nearly unleashing a vicious army of harmless snakes on the group, and Biyomon reminds him that there are plenty of other things awaiting their chance to slaughter them.

Patamon: “Are you okay, Takeru?!”
Tentomon: “What’s the point of saying that now?”
Patamon: “Don’t you worry, T.K., I’ll take care of them!”

Patamon‘s checking in on Takeru after the fact was adorable and silly, but the dub writers decided he is the Destroyer of Bugs and Snakes instead. Fair trade!

[Now that that’s settled…]
Yamato: “Right. Crying isn’t going to get us anywhere.”
Taichi: “That’s fine, but… we don’t know which way to go or anyone to turn to.”
Matt: “Nothing’s settled, and where would we go? We don’t even know where we are!”
Tai: “This is silly! I say we keep moving and see if we can find any signs of intelligent life here!”

Nope.

… nope!

[Piyomon nuzzles Sora]
Piyomon: “As long as I’m where Sora is, I’m not worried!”
Biyomon: “Hey, wait a minute! Is he saying that Digimon are not intelligent? IS THAT WHAT HE’S SAYING??”

Is this the part where Biyomon gets firepower?

[Ugh]
Sora: “About that… Even if you’re 100% relaxed, it’s a problem for me. I can’t take responsibility.”
Piyomon: “‘100 per…’?”
Sora: “I-it’s fine. Don’t worry about it!”
Piyomon: “‘Take responsibility’?”
Sora: “I said it’s fine! Don’t worry about it!”
Piyomon: “Sora, I REALLY want to know what you’re talking about! Tell me! Okay?”
Sora: “You don’t need to know that.”
Yamato: “What are you doing playing around?”
Taichi: “Well said!”
Sora: “I’m not playing around because I like it!”
Sora: “Not at all, but I think Tai is right. We need to keep moving in hopes of finding out where we are. We need to stay calm and stick together. Let’s remember, we’re in this together!”
Biyomon: “Together sounds good!”
Sora: “We can do it! This’ll take teamwork. And I’m sure we’ll figure out exactly where we are and how to get back!” (the others are ditching her) “There’s no point in splitting up, because then, once somebody did figure it out, we–“
Biyomon: “Hey, Sora? Open your eyes.”
Sora: “… Well, thanks a lot for waiting!”

Yeah, Piyomon is straight-up annoying in the original. Biyomon and Sora share the part with Sora’s “Teamwork Girl” nonsense in the dub.

[Sora follows the others]
Tentomon: “Piyomon is a friendly Digimon.”
Koushirou: “I see. So Digimon all have unique personalities…”
Matt: “Moving right along, folks! Keep it moving! Our next stop on the tour will be the Forest of Irrelevant Road Signs! No pictures, please!”

Matt, shut the fuck up.

[Piyomon is now holding her hand and lovingly saying her name and it’s weird]
Sora: “Can I really work with this clingy Digimon?”
Sora: “We’re lost and these guys are making jokes!”

“Matt, shut the fuck up.”

[Forest wandering]
No dialogue.
Joe: “Hey, wait up! My shoelace is broken!”
Mimi: “You need new shoes! Ooh, new shoes!”

Ugh.

… She’s right, though…

[An exit into a desert!]
Yamato: “We’re getting out of the forest!”
Matt: “Look! Telephone poles! I say we follow them and see where they lead!”
Joe: “They’ll just lead to trouble.”

He’s right, though…

[The black gear flies into the top of a weird, grassy hill nowhere near a desert]
No dialogue.
Izzy: “Look! The alien saucer again!”
Matt: “And it’s headed for a close encounter!”

Yeah, they’re not nearly close enough to have seen that.

---

[Now we’re walking in a desert. This is a good idea.]
Koushirou: “This is like the African Savannah I saw on television…”
Taichi: “Huh? So there a lions and giraffes here?!”
T.K.: “Boy, it’s so hot I can feel the heat coming up through my socks!”
Matt: “Well, T.K., maybe you should put your shoes back on.”

Hey, big brother responsible for the small child: why’d you let him take his shoes off?

Yamato: “Well, normal animals like that would still be nice…”
Gabumon: “There aren’t any animals like that here.”
Tentomon: “Tha’s correct. There’re nothin’ but Digimon here.” (… and fish…) (… fishiemon…?)
Mimi: “Oh, this hot desert air is destroying my complexion! How much further is it?”
Joe: “Is that all you’re worried about, Mimi?! We’ll be lucky if we even survive this hike!”

Yeah, but you still want to look good if you don’t survive!

Taichi: “Nothing but Digimon, huh?”
Yamato: “Koushirou, did the savannah you saw have telephone poles?”
Koushirou: “No, it didn’t.”
Jou: “There must be humans nearby! I’m sure of it!”
Sora: “Hey, did anyone besides me see that these telephone poles have no connecting wires?”
Izzy: “She’s right! I wonder if these are telephone poles. Maybe they’re some odd alien equivalent.”

That just makes them alien telephone poles – i.e. still telephone polls.

Taichi: “Heh? But what about the phone booths, or the vehicle at the lake?”
Mimi: “Hey! Remember those phone booths and that street car?”
Izzy: “Yeah. What about ’em?”
Mimi: “Oh, nothing. I was just wondering if anybody else remembered!”

[Jou stops walking]
Jou: “No, that’s not true! There are definitely, absolutely people here!”
Joe: “That’s it! DOOMED! The heat has baked our brains! We’re all gonna end up liked roasted piglets!”
Izzy: “Just remain calm, Joe. We’ve only been walking for two minutes.”

But I’m hungry now…

[Tentomon gets Koushirou’s attention for some secrets]
Tentomon: “Koushirou. Koushirou… I’m tellin’ you, there’re nothin’ but Digimon here.”
Tentomon: “Psst! Izzy! Come here, Izzy! I think we’d better find some shade for Joe… and quick!”

This was a funny, but more subtle bit that the dub didn’t keep. Tentomon has been telling these kids for like three episodes that there are only Digimon in their world, but they all keep wondering if there could be humans around. Poor guy must be wondering why the hell they keep ignoring him.

[Mimi is pleased about something]
Mimi: “I wonder where here is~! Ta-da~!” *everyone gathers around the compass, which quickly proves unhelpful* “No!! What is this?!”
Mimi: “You won’t believe what happened to my favorite watch!”
Joe: “Hmm? What?”
Mimi: “The sun melted the numbers right off!”

Like what the dub did to your personality!

Tai: “Mimi, for somebody who hates hiking, you sure have a lot of compasses! Of course, none of them actually work.”

She has one compass. Maybe that’s “a lot” to Tai; it’s probably higher than he can count.

[Koushirou inspects the ground]
Koushirou: “This looks like sand, but now that I look closely, it’s powdered iron! It’s sticking to the magnet!”
Sora: “This is really an unbelieveable place we’ve come to…”
Izzy: “Oh, this dirt contains small traces of metal which could affect the compass needle.”
Mimi: “Oh, well! I’m always late anyway!”
Sora: “This is one weird world, and I don’t like it one little bit!”

“Traces of metal” are not enough to disrupt a compass. There are traces of metals, including ferromagnetic ones, like… everywhere.

Koushirou: “And it’s hot here. Wouldn’t it be best if we get some water soon?”
Taichi: “Yeah. For sure.”
Mimi: “AAAHHH~! JUST WHERE IS THIS PLACE?!”
Izzy: “I think we should start looking for water, guys. Otherwise, we could dehydrate in all this heat.”
Tai: “Yeah. But we’re doing okay for now, aren’t we?”
Mimi: “HELP! SOMEBODY PLEASE FIND US!”

Doin’ great!

You know how it zooms out from Mimi while she’s yelling? Well, in the dub, when that’s done they reverse the animation to zoom back in.

Why? I don’t know.

[After a brief glimpse of the gear and some dude, we return to the desert]
Taichi: “It’s so hot…”
Jou: “It really would have been better to stay in the forest.”
Yamato: “We’ll all overheat at this rate.”
Jou: “Are you too hot, Gomamon?”
Gomamon: “I need some ice… or some water.”
Izzy: “I’ve taken a soil sample, measured the barometric pressure, and analyzed the relative humidity.”
Sora: “And… what did you find out?”
Izzy: “We’re boned It’s really, really hot.”

Wait, what did you need the soil sample for?

Mimi: “Do you want to wear my hat, Palmon?”
Palmon: “Thank you.”
Mimi: “It looks good on you!”
Mimi: “We’re gonna be okay! Just keep moving along!”
Palmon: “My head is baking! If this goes on too much longer, I’m going to look like a wilted salad!”
Mimi: “Here, you wear my hat for a while. You need it more than I do!”

A salad would go nicely with those roasted piglets, though…

Piyomon: “Sora! Sora! Let’s do our best and keep walking!”
Sora: “You’re in good spirits…”
Piyomon: “Sora! Sora!”
Sora: “Enough already! I’m thirsty and tired, and I’m tired of walking, so don’t wastefully play around! You’re making me more tired!”
T.K.: “Pee-yew! What’s that yucky smell?”
Matt: “Ugh! Here’s a thought: now you know why they call them ‘sweat socks’!”

Okay, but why can we smell them now? You’re outside, and your shoes are on… And you’re fictitious. WHY IS THE SMELL IN MY ROOM?

Mimi: “This beach would be a lot more popular if it just had a couple more things! Like an ocean, a gentle breeze, snack bar, hunky lifeguards…” *giggle*

I am never searching for pictures of David Hasselhoff for you people again

Piyomon: “Sora is tired… I’m sorry. Piyomon will be quiet.”
Sora: “Ugh… I get it, I get it! Let’s walk together.”
Piyomon: “I’m so happy! Sora, I love you!”
Biyomon: “Hold it, I have to stop! I just don’t think that I can go any faster.”
Sora: “You have to stay positive. Let’s all pretend that it’s raining.”
Biyomon: “Yeah, that’s a great idea! I simply adore the rain!”

Poor Sora, though! She is obviously not having a good time with Piyomon clinging to her. Dub Sora is fine, of course, if a bit in denial!

Yamato: “But we keep walking and walking, and nothing comes into sight. Maybe we’d better go back to the forest.”
Matt: “Me, too, but it’s time for a reality check!”

That reminds me: yours bounced.

Matt: “This isn’t getting any better! It might be a good idea to turn around and get out of this desert right now!”
Tentomon: “You mean before we all have a power outage? I’ll vote for that!”

Uh-huh. I’m on to you…

[There’s something up ahead]
Taichi: “Wait just a second.” *telescope* “It’s a village!”
Tai: “Wait. Hold on for just a second, everybody… If I’m seeing what I think I’m seeing…” *telescope*
Izzy: “What is it, Tai?”
Tai: “Mmm hmmm, it’s not a mirage! It’s real water!”

Questionably potable, but definitely boatabl— OW!

Jou: “See? See? See? If there’s a village, there must be people!”
Joe: “This is fantastic! Now all we need are some lemons, sugar, and some big, fat ice cubes!”

Cups?

Mimi: “I was getting really thirsty, Palmon.”
Mimi: “Maybe they’ll have hats for sale! Hang on!”

To our hats?!

Takeru: “I’m so hungry…”
Patamon: “Hungry, hungry!”
T.K: “I’m hungry enough to eat broccoli!”
Patamon: “What’s broccoli? Is that a joke?”

Ooh, we could cook up some broccoli to go with the roasted piglets!

---

[After a brief interlude where the gear fucks up that dude from before, we arrive at the village]
Taichi: “It was a Pyokomon village.”
Piyomon: “Pyokomon! You’re all my friends!”
Pyokomon: “Hey, hey! What kind of Digimon are you?”
Sora: “Eh? Me?”
Piyomon: “No, no! These people aren’t Digimon! They’re something called humans. They’re really nice!”
Biyomon: “Okay, question. Who here knows where we can get a drink?”

Biyomon, it’s barely noon…

Yokomon: “And just what do giant Digimon drink?”
Sora: “Me? I’m no Digimon.”
Biyomon: “My friend Sora is what’s called a human being. Yes, we know they look funny. In spite of this, they are all actually very nice.”

Biyomon has a very generous definition of “nice”.

Pyokomon: “‘Humans?'”
Pyokomon: “They’re not Digimon?”
Yokomon: “What’s a human being?”
Yokomon: “If you are not Digimon, what are you doing here in DigiWorld?”

Digital World. It’s not a theme park.

The Pyokomon all had different voices in the original. In the dub, they all have seem to have the same high-pitched voice.

Jou: “I thought there would be people here…”
Taichi: “Everything is Pyokomon-size.”
Joe: “This is great. There is no way we are all going to fit into this place.”
Tai: “Relax, Joe. At least the natives here are friendly.”

Yeah! You’ll fit in socially, if not physically!

Mimi: “This reminds me of a story my mama read to me when I was little!”
Yamato: “I thought we might be able to stay here for the night, but that looks impossible.”
Koushirou: “We can’t even fit inside the houses.”
Mimi: “Oh, my! I would just love to take one home and put it on my bed with all my other stuffed animals!”
Matt: “There she goes again. Do you think Mimi hears the same thing we hear? I’m not sure anymore.”
Izzy: “Maybe she’s an alien spy.”

Matt, you’re an asshole. Izzy, you’re a moron. Writers, you have some serious issues with young girls. A dub’s script is not the place to work out these issues. You need therapy.

Patamon: “Some of us can fit!”
Jou: “But it’s impossible for the humans…”
Patamon: “T.K. is tired and hungry!”
Joe: “He’s not the only one.”

Nobody cares, Patamon!

[The Pyokomon interrogate Piyomon for details on how she evolved, and she blames it on having to protect Sora]
Sora: “What is she saying, with how clingy she’s been?”
Sora: “She had to protect me..? Wait a sec; now I get it. That’s why she’s always following me around!”

“And here I though it was because she liked me!”

Sora: (thinking) “But… on that note…” *Taichi/Agumon/Greymon flashback* *Yamato/Gabumon/Garurumon flashback* “Then… if I’m in danger…” (aloud) “That can’t be it!”
Sora: (thinking) “When Tai needed him, Agumon digivolved to Greymon to protect him, and Garurumon did the same for Matt. They digivolve for us.” (aloud) “We’re lucky kids!”

You’re trapped in a dangerous alien world with no way to get home, currently visiting an alien village too small to accommodate you. Yep – everything’s comin’ up Sora!

Piyomon: “Sora! The Pyokomon have invited us to stay for a feast! Yahoo!”
Biyomon: “Sora! We’re invited to have dinners with the Yokos. They said they’d be willing to share their food with all of us.”

Please don’t call them ‘Yokos’.That sounds like the name of a cannibal tribe that… you know what? You go and enjoy your meal… _{whichever end of it you may be…}

Jou: “Huge thanks to the Pyokomon!”
Joe: “Let’s see hands if you want lemonade!”

Joe, there’s no lemon juice. You’re getting cactus juice, and you will like it.

Mimi: “I’m so hungry!”
Taichi: “I’m gonna eat ’til I suffer!”
T.K.: “I wonder what Yokomon eats.”
Tai: “I’ll take a cheeseburger, fries, and a shake!”

Well, I guess that’s an accurate translation, just with different time frames. Taichi’s going to suffer immediately, Tai’s going to suffer in ten years when he has his first heart attack.

Koushirou: (thinking) “I wonder what food they’ll give us…”
Takeru: (while Koushirou is imagining food) “Water! Water! Water!!”
Izzy: (thinking) “I wonder what they will be serving. Perhaps some bone with meat, lettuce topped with fish, or…”

Just lemons, ironically. They don’t juice ’em; they just eat ’em. Enjoy!

[The fountain water is from Miharashi Mountain – best in the dub world]
Tentomon: “This is the famous Miharashi Mountain’s delicious water!”
Tentomon: “Forget the world! Mount Miharashi water is the best in all the galaxy.”

Right? That Mars water ain’t shit.

[Miharashi Mountain is over there]
Takeru: “That mountain?”
T.K.: “Hey, that’s a live volcano.”
Yokomon: “Yes, but the heat boils away all the germs.”

Second graders at Takeru’s school get an early start on Geology! Yokomon get an early start on burning their guests with their apparently boiling drinking water.

---

[That dude from before explodes in flames, and the fountain stops running]
No dialogue.
Izzy: “If I’m not mistaken, that noise precedes an eruption!”

It sounded a little like a toilet in late flush, so Izzy might be confused about the order of things.

[Now the fountain explodes in flames, the opposite of what a fountain is supposed to do]
Takeru: “No! I was so thirsty!”
Mimi: “I didn’t get a drink yet!”
T.K.: “That’s cool, but I still didn’t get a drink!”

They said the water was hot!

[The pond is empty save for the boat]
Displeased cries.
Izzy: “The water’s all gone!”
Mimi: “Goodness, where did it go?”
T.K: “Somebody pulled the plug!”
Tai: “All right, let’s not panic.”

A huge pond like that drying up in the span of a few minutes is, in fact, cause for panic. That shit takes a while.

[Taichi throws a bucket down into the village’s well. All they hear is a “fwoom”]
Taichi: “Ah?”
Yamato: “Pull it up anyway.”
Taichi: “Got it.”
Matt: “Dry as a bone.”
Tai: “I won’t give up.”

[Tai pulls the bucket up, but it’s gone, and the end of the rope is singed. More fire shoots up out of the well. He flails]
Pyokomon: “I remember seeing something land on Miharashi Mountain!”
Mimi: “Look, Tai’s doing a little dance for us! Is that supposed to stop the fire, or bring down the rain?”

Well, he’s doing it wrong!

[What about that black gear that landed on the mountain?]
Sora: “But what does a black gear landing in Miharashi Mountain have to do with this?”
Jou: “Wh-What’s going on?”
Pyokomon: “Miharashi Mountain is the water source for this area, so if anything happens to it, all the water could disappear.”
Sora: “Great. Of all the hillsides out there, the Gear crashes into Mihirashi Mountain.”
Joe: “That’s the place where the water comes from!”
Yokomon: “That’s right; the water comes from a lake on the top of Mount Miharashi, so a gear crashing into the mountain could affect our water supply!”

That’s Gear for you. Shows up out of nowhere, drinks all the water, and crashes. Just lock the bathroom doors; he’ll leave in an hour or so.

Pyokomon: “But Miharashi Mountain is where Meramon is!”
Pyokomon: “Meramon should be protecting Miharashi Mountain!”
Yokomon: “We don’t dare go up there; the mountain is guarded by a fiery Digimon called Meramon. He’s hideously dangerous!”

Hideously a dangerous good guy.

[Taichi brings out his telescope again]
Taichi: “Miharashi Mountain, eh? Let’s take a look.” *telescope* “What’s that?”
Tai: “I want a closer look at that mountain!” *telescope* “You say this character Meramon is fiery Digimon? What does he look like?”

Like a Digimon, but on fire.

Narrator: “Meramon, an ever-burning Flame Digimon. He burns up everything he touches in battle.”
Palmon: “Meramon is a fiery digimon. There’s no reason he should be in pain from his own flames. That’s his nature.”

Indeed, it seems the dub writers believed Meramon’s “I’m burning up!” was due to the misfortune of being literally on fire. In Japanese, it means you’re getting pumped or “fired up” – determined, enthusiastic. Meramon is not in pain, which is probably why he is grinning like an idiot the whole time. Not exactly the expression of someone on fire and unhappy about it.

Meramon’s special attack, Burning Fist, is Fireball in the dub.

[Here comes Meramon]
Meramon: “I’m burning up!”
Taichi: “That’s… Meramon?!”
Tai: “This is weird. He’s crying!”

Sora: “He’s saying something…”
Taichi: “Yeah…”
Meramon: “I’m burning up now!!”
Sora: “Sounds like he’s out of his mind with pain.”
Tai: “What do we do?”
Meramon: “Burning, burning, burning!”

Mon, what a time to be out of water!

Maybe his eyes are just watering because he’s been looking at a screen too long?

The dub replays a little bit of the footage after where there’s usually a commercial break. This is normal with dubs, though, because they think children can’t remember what happened three minutes ago.

[Meramon is running towards the village]
Meramon: “I’m burning up now!!”
*let’s all stare!*
Meramon: “I’m burning up! Burning! Burning!”
Taichi: “EVERYONE… RUN!!!”
Jou: “Y-Yeah!”
Sora: “Look, he’s coming straight toward the village!”
Biyomon: “Hey, everybody. We’d better decide what we’re going to do. I’ve never seen him move so fast. He’s already reached the foot of the mountain, and now he’s starting to enter the forest!”
Sora: “Everybody, freeze! Stay very still.”

Why?

Meramon: “You’re going to need more than sunscreen to stop me!”

I thought you were supposed to be in pain!

Sora: “Don’t move a muscle!”
Meramon: “Agh! Burn, burn, burn!”

All right, you’re not fooling anyone, mister!

Tai: “Ah! Unfreeze! … And ruuuun!”

“Why did we ‘freeze’ in the first place?! DAMNIT, we’re stupid!”

[The Pyokomon take shelter in the boat]
Yamato: “Be careful where you step!”
Matt: “Okay, settle down! There’s room for all of you! Will you please stop squirming!”

NEVER!

[Piyomon is directing Pyokomon to the boat]
Piyomon: “Run this way, everyone!”
Pyokomon (1): “You too, Piyomon! Hurry and run!”
Pyokomon (2): “He’ll get you, Piyomon!”
Piyomon: “I’ll be okay! You Pyokomon are all my friends, are you?”
Sora: “That idiot… she’s saving her friends…” *runs after Piyomon*
Biyomon: “Everyone keep moving, now! Just follow the
one in front of you!”
Sora: “Biyomon, save yourself! Come down while there’s
still time!”
Biyomon: “I can’t leave here until all my friends are safe, Sora!”
Sora: “All right, I suppose I’ll just have to come up there after you, then!”

Sora, she can fly.

Her mouth wasn’t even moving, for fuck’s sake.
Biyomon: “Ah, good. They’re all safe now!”

I would tell you to shut up, but your beak IS shut and YOU’RE STILL TALKING!

[Meramon comes up behind Piyomon.]
Piyomon: *flaps silently*
Meramon: *roars hilariously*
Biyomon: “Go away, Meramon! Leave us alone! We’re not bothering you!”

And you don’t have any fire extinguishers for him, which sucks because like the ENTIRE village is made of straw…

[Meramon knocks Piyomon down]
Sora: “Piyomon!”
Sora: “B.O.! B.O.! I’m coming, B.O.!”

Oh, yeah, and the water ran out before anyone could shower.

[Sora has caught Piyomon from her tumble]
Piyomon: “Sora, you came to save Piyomon…”
Sora: “Of course! You’re my important friend!”
Piyomon: “Thank you, Sora!”
Biyomon: “I hope I never do that again. It wasn’t very fun. Thank you for coming to rescue me.”
Sora: “Don’t mention it. That’s what a friend is for.”
Biyomon: “You can say that again… my friend.”

So when does Biyomon get the firepower?

[Piyomon flies up to battle Meramon]
Biyomon: “You think you’re really hot stuff, well you’re in big trouble now!”

This seems like a really good idea.

[Magical Fire and more Magical Fire]
Meramon: *chuckles*
Biyomon: “Okay big red, take that! And that! And that!”
Meramon: “Is that the best you have to offer, weakling?”

It really is the best she has to offer.

I still love how Patamon is pushing Tentomon’s slow ass as they go to help.

I got a new screencap, but I still owe thanks to mlseason4 and Carochinha for the assists!

[Meramon knocks Piyomon out of the air with Burning Fist, and the others decide it’s time to stop staring]
Taichi: “Hey! Everyone support Piyomon!”
Koushirou: “Go, Tentomon!”
Meramon: *giggles*
Tai: “Come on, everyone! We can beat that monster.”
Izzy: “What we need is teamwork!”
Meramon: “I’m ready. Give me your best shot!”

[Meramon absorbs their electricity, fire, and air-based teamwork and grows larger for some reason]
Yamato: “You can do it!”
Joe: “We need a fire extinguisher!”
Matt: “That made him bigger!”
Joe: “Yeah.”

You know, if Gomamon used Marching Fishes on him, you kids wouldn’t have to worry about lunch…

[Meramon grows even larger]
Taichi: “Meramon can’t be hurt by flames, can he?!”
Meramon: “Why do I suffer so?”
Tai: “If we knew why he was crying, it might help to stop him!”

Well, you try being on fire and see how it feels!

Koushirou: “He’s sucking in everyone’s energy!”
Yamato: “He’s getting so big…”
Jou: “It’s no good!”
Izzy: “Well, fire’s not affecting him! I’m guessing it’s not heartburn!”
Matt: “Maybe this monster just has growing pains!”
Izzy: “‘Growing pains’?”
Joe: “Matt, this is not a time to joke!”

Seriously, Matt. Read the room.

[Meramon is now very large and is coming on down off the cliff to stomp some Pyokomon ass]
Meramon: “I’m burning up!”
Meramon: “Better get ready, here I come!”

So is Biyomon going to shoot anyone, or..?

[Piyomon gets up and notices that Sora is apparently not feeling awesome]
Piyomon: “Sora… Sora is in danger… I can’t lose like this!”
Biyomon: “Sora..? We’re all in trouble now. Meramon can not be allowed to win. My friends need my help now.”

You were ALLOWING him to win??

Birdramon’s voice actor, bless her heart, tries to do Birdramon’s bird-roar thing. It sounds ridiculously bad. She tries, though.

[Piyomon evolves to Birdramon]
Sora: “Piyomon… evolved into Birdramon…”
Sora: “We’ll be safe now. Biyomon digivolved to rescue us.”

I’m shocked by how safe we’ll be!

[Birdramon has pulled Meramon back onto the cliff]
Meramon: “I’m… really burning up with fire now!!”
[Burning Fist hits Birdramon on the wing]
Sora: “Birdramon!”
Meramon: “What’s wrong Birdramon? Afraid of me? Let’s fight! Here, have a ball!”

I knew he was faking it! What a chode!

[Birdramon is hit]
Sora: “Don’t turn your back!”

Meramon: “I’m… I’m burning with fire!” *attack* “Burning!” *boom* “Burniiiing!” *boom*
Sora: “Birdramon! You can do it!”
*Birdramon takes three hits from Meramon*
Sora: “Birdramon, move away!”

I would say that nobody likes a backseat-fighter, but… Birdramon might actually be kind of stupid.

Birdramon’s special attack isn’t named in the dub version, but we all know it’s Meteor Wing.

Koushirou: “A black gear…”
Izzy: “It was the Gear!”
Patamon: “What is it?”
Izzy: “It made him crazy!

I told you to lock the bathroom door! He won’t stick around if he can’t pee, and he won’t do it outside!

Yamato: “So that black gear was inside Meramon’s body. That was why…”
Matt: “I suppose if you had a big black Gear stuck inside of you, you’d act a little crazy, too! The poor guy.”

Okay, he’s not THAT bad. He leaves my sparkling water alone, at least, and he remembers to put the toilet lid down!

[Birdramon reverts to Piyomon]
Sora: “Piyomon evolved into Birdramon to save me…”
Sora: “WOW. Every time I’m in danger (once), Biyomon comes to my rescue. Now that’s what I call a friend!”

Piyomon: “Sora, Sora, Sora!”
Sora: “Piyomon! Piyomon! Thank you, Piyomon! Really!”
Piyomon: “I only did what I had to, because I love you, Sora!”
Biyomon: “Are you all right? Oh, Sora!”
Sora: “Oh, B.! I was so worried about you! You’re great. I can’t begin to tell you how proud I am of you.”
Biyomon: “I wasn’t the least bit afraid! All I could think about was saving you, because… well, you know…”

“… you owe me twenty bucks…”

Pyokomon 1: “Meramon, have you woken up?”
Meramon: “Why…?”
Pyokomon 2: “I’m glad you woke up, Meramon!”
Pyokomon 3: “Why did you do that, Meramon? What happened?”
Meramon: “A gear fell from the sky… and then…”
Pyokomon 2: “You don’t know either?”
Pyokomon 1: “Meramon, please protect Miharashi Mountain like you always have!”
Yokomon: “Meramon, why did you attack our village?”
Meramon: “I couldn’t control myself. I just had to DANCE.“
Yokomon: “That must have been awful for you! If you couldn’t control yourself, who was controlling you?”
Meramon: “The last thing I remember is being hit by that geeaaarr…”
Yokomon: “Well, we’re just happy to see that you’re back to normal. I hope nothing like this ever happens again. You’re needed to protect Mount
Miharashi!”

The black gears just turn Digimon violent; they don’t really put them under someone’s control beyond that.

[Meramon departs]
Taichi: “Don’t turn back into a bad Digimon anymore!”
Patamon: “Keep protecting the duhmountain!”
Yokomon: “Goodbye, Meramon! May you always stay well.”
Another Yokomon: “Goodbye! And please, try not to burn down our village anymore! Okay?”
Meramon: “No promises.”

Meramon’s dub voice sounds gruff and forced. In the original, his yelling voice is a bit high-pitched and emotional, and his normal voice sounds… well, normal.

Piyomon: “Oh yeah! The Pyokomon promised to give us a feast!”
Takeru: “My stomach is growling!”
Pyokomon: “Leave it to us!”
Biyomon: ‘Hey! I just remembered you never got that dinner we promised you. You must be starving!”
T.K: “My tummy’s ready for some action!”
*Pyokomon chatter*

[It’s seeds]
Taichi: “… This is a feast?”
Mimi: “Be polite and just eat it! A gracious guest never insults the host’s cooking!”
Tai: “… I can’t tell if it’s even been cooked!”

You tell him, Mimi!

Piyomon: “Sora, why aren’t you eating? It’s really good!”
Palmon: “Yeah! Mimi, why don’t you eat, too?”
Biyomon: “Eat as much as you want! We have more than enough for seconds!”
Joe: “Yeah, well, there’s probably a good reason for that!”

Don’t be a dick, Joe.

Sora: “Humans don’t usually eat this kind of stuff.”
Sora: “You know, that was exactly what I was a afraid you were going to say.”

We’re all afraid of when Joe makes a joke, Sora.

Takeru: “But… *stomach growls* I’ll eat it!”
T.K.: “It smells better than broccoli. Who knows? Might taste better!”

Broccoli is delicious.

Yamato: “No use fighting an empty stomach.”
Taichi: “Let’s dig in!”
Matt: “Has anybody noticed? We talk a lot about food.” *munch*

I love food.

Sora: “Eh? Seriously?!”
Sora: “Nah, I’m not hungry.”

Jou: “It’s really not bad if you chew it for a while.”
Mimi: “NOOO~! I really want to go hoooome!”
Joe: “I’m skipping this one, too. I just don’t like to eat on an empty stomach. Besides, I don’t even know what that stuff is, but I’m sure I’m allergic to it.”

Ungrateful brats…

Sora: “Piyomon saved me from harm… When I was in danger, she really did evolve.”
Sora: “One thing’s for certain: for being so little, she sure has a HUGE heart.”

Cardiomegaly isn’t a joke, Sora. It’s very serious.